YOU'RE WELCOME: A Gift Guide for BBQs

Memorial Day Weekend is upon us, and, of course, it signifies the official start of the summer.

Forget the fact that if you've been in the Northeast the past few weeks, the rainy, depressing weather has probably got you wanting to slit your wrists just so you can see some goddamned color.

Here comes the sun, everyone.

CORONAS. BOARD SHORTS. CHAMBRAY. BBQS.

What's that, Jessie Spano? You are so excited, so excited, so scared for this gift guide to summer BBQs?

Damn straight.

Head over to You're Welcome to check it out.  And bring beer.

YOU'RE WELCOME: Gifts for the Nautically-Obsessed

Mid-life crisises manifest themselves differently with different people.  Some people act out "The Pina Colada Song" and troll for anonymous sex at midnight while they may or may not be caught in the rain.  Some people have sex with the babysitter.  Some people buy a car they can't afford.  This guy, however, bought a boat.  His family didn't see it coming.  They had no clue they were being signed up for a life at sea.

Batten the hatches!  I see a gift guide for the nautically-obsessed off the starboard side!

Jump overboard to You're Welcome to see it. 

YOU'RE WELCOME: Gifts for Your Mom

Kay Jewelers has been brainwashing us for years, making us think that heart-shaped diamond pendants are the ultimate way to show someone that you love them. 

"Diamonds are a girl's best friend," sluts and golddiggers say, but you know who my best friend is? 

MONEY. 

Write me a check and I will love you forever.  But if your mother's blood type isn't ice cubes like mine, she might want something a little more thoughtful.

Looking for a bunch of worthy gift suggestions that will let Mom know just how much (or, how little) you care?

Head over to You're Welcome to get the scoop.

  

[LINKED] You're Welcome

I've been noticing a lot of things about myself lately.

1. I really enjoy it when white people do acoustic covers of rap songs.

2. I love capitalism.

What better way to celebrate my love of capitalism and gangsta rap with the launch of my very own website devoted to all of the great shit you can buy for other people?

Answer?  There's no better way. 

And so, I bring you You're Welcome.

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