[DESIGN STAR RECAP] Episode 6: We Got Trumped

All I can say is: I fucking missed Mad Men for this??

[Yes. Yes I did].

Ok, so its week one post Nina elimination, and I may as well check in with all y'all to see how everybody else is doing?

Cause I'll tell you how I'm doing: I'm alsfjsa;lfjaslfjdaslfjdslfj (oh sorry, I just fell asleep as I was typing on my keyboard). As predicted, this bitch has turned into SNOOZE-A-PALOOZA, and had I not mainlined 8 cans of Diet Coke today, I'd likely be dead asleep on my Chesterfield right about now.

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Design Star Roundup

Ok, so if you think my ass is the only one covering this Design Star crap parade, you are so very wrong. Though my recaps ARE a good place to start, there's way more #DesignStar shit you should not be missing.

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[DESIGN STAR RECAP] Episode 5: New York's Bravest Makeovers

I really loved the firemen theme of last night's show, and here's why:

• After watching the ep, I was extremely tempted to set my own TV on fire...and then my cable box that delivers HGTV to my apt...and then my own motherfucking face. YES, I WANTED TO SET THEM ALLLL ON FIRE.
• I think the entire staff responsible for dreaming up these assinine team challenges should all be FIREed.

Yeah, so obvs I was really feeling the whole firemen thing pretty hard. But that was the *only* thing I was feelin last night cuz SPOILER ALERT: Nina finally goes home!--and I'm actually pretty wrecked over it.

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Design Star Queen of the Dramz: Le Nina

OH. EM. EFF. GEE.

Behold the photos that I came across on HGTV Design Star contestant Nina's website. This is apparently her PROFESSIONAL website, where she showcases her work, and presumably sends people who she wants to hire her. Like for real jobs that pay real money.

Y'all know I've been obsessed with this HGTV Design Star bullshit. We're four eps into the season, and mostly all we've gotten is: shitty challenges, HORRENDOUS designs, poorly dressed judges and dramz. I've entirely given up on the idea of ever seeing any inspired designs, so really, all I'm left with is the fighting. And pretty much all of the dramz is focused around this crazy deer head masturbating egomaniac Nina.

Only, I didn't even know the half of it. This bitch is MUCH, MUCH crazier than I originally thought (and all the evidence is conveniently located on her site!).

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[DESIGN STAR RECAP] Episode 4: Flower Power

Well bitches, its been a wet hot American summer all up in this piece, and I for one missed the shit out of our favorite Design Star whack pack as I was sweating my ass off over the July 4th weekend. But, hooray! They were back last night and better than ever (and by better, of course, I mean way, way, WAY worse).

Mostly I'd just like to thank Gawd almighty up in heaven above for giving us the gift that is Nina. Whoever cast this show deserves a gigantic fucking raise for finding this mural obsessed, one trick pony and I for one want to make sure they do not go unrecognized. I SALUTE YOU, HGTV CASTING DEPT!

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