[WHO GIVES A SHIT?] Holiday Cards

Ok, so do you people still do this holiday card shit?

I'm a Jew, so I never *really* got into this scene to begin with. And, in truth, those cheesy family photo cards make me want to barf a little bit. And yet...and yet, there is a leetle bitty part of me that's still a little jelly of those cards and for like 11 seconds each year when I get one in the mail. And then like for one brief, shining moment I think to myself: awww, maybe we'll do one next year!

And then we never ever never ever do.

I mean, I don't know ANYONE'S phone number unless I look at my cell phone, so forget about addresses. Who has people's addresses any more??

Anyway.

The one place I've found where I kind of like these cards is on Minted.com. And also I guess this is mostly a ppl with kids kinda thing to do anyway.

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[A GIRL CAN DREAM] Commonwealth Butcher Block

In my dreams, I have an amazing chef's kitchen with stainless steel appliances, Wusthoff Knives stocked in the drawer, and a restaurant-grade range with red knobs (you know the one I'm talking about). 

In reality, I have white cabinets, ugly formica countertops, a stove that was a hold-over from the Cold War, and a fridge that couldn't even hold the Olsen Twins' food for the week. 

This is what happens when your landlords are picking shit out: they go with whatever the fuck is the cheapest possible thing in the world.  Thanks, guys.  Really.

This butcher block from Matter could definitely find a coveted spot in my dream kitchen, but for $2,500, that'll be after I win the lottery or murder one of my co-workers in order to get a promotion and a pay raise. 

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'Dyson Wants To Vacuum Your Pet'...My Pet Wants To Firebomb Dyson

Srsly, dudez.  He just told me.

Oliver asked for some detailed instructions on:

1. How he could join Al Queda.

2. How he could then convince Al Queda that Dyson is a worthy target.

I wouldn't tell him, cause terrorism is wrong. But he's so fucking freaked out by these photos, I'm not sure what might happen. And I'm so confused by them I'm not quite sure what to say.

Apparently Dyson is going to start selling this attachment to their vacuum cleaners that aims to remove excess fur and skin cells before they actually shed. Only that is achieved by VACUUMING YOUR MOTHERFUCKING DOG.

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[COOL OR NOT COOL] Wall Decals

To be honest, the very idea of "wall decals" suggests to me, "Hey, I'm in college and I can't afford real artwork!"  I mean, really, why don't you just hang up a crooked poster of Sex & the City or something?

But then I see something like the photo to the left, and I think that in the right hands, wall decals could end up looking sophisticated.   

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[I'M OBSESSED] Painted Doors

I'm not really sure WTF is wrong with me, but there is just some design shit that I C-A-N'T get over. Like no matter what. I'm so serious.

Come back and talk to me in 20 years, and I bet you a million billion dollars I'll still be obsessed with painted doors. All of the doors in my apt/house/whatevs will be painted some glossy, dark color and you'll be like "uhm, aren't painted doors kind of 2008-2010??" And I'll be all "what the fuck is your point?? Annnnnd you need a facelift! BOOM"

Anyway.

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